Friday Fun: The Secret Lives of Trisexuals

From Elevation Outdoors
Do you have enough love in your heart, and gear in your closet, to crush three sports at once?
Who are those hairless wonders we see biking and running around, still emblazoned with race numbers etched on their over-sunned, über-lean bodies, wearing nothing more than skimpy bikini bathing suits (regardless of gender) and compression wear over their lower legs, triceps and just about every other visible muscle?
Meet the “Trisexuals.” Not to be confused with single- or double-sport aficionados, these swim-bike-run addicts are a breed of their own. But, fear not! You too can be one.
To be honest, even if you wanted to hang with Trisexuals, they probably wouldn’t party with you. First, they are strong individualists and it’s sort of a chicken-or-egg question of whether they naturally gravitate towards their solo sport or if it’s because nobody wants to be teamed up with them. Triathletes tend towards social Darwinism. When they aren’t training (or prepping to train or telling you about their onerous training regimen) and they stop to read something other than their triathlon magazines it will be Ayn Rand or Nietzsche. Note: They do this reading in an altitude tent.
Triathletes are speed freaks, obsessed with moving faster than you. Anything that might create drag, whether it be hair, traditional bike spokes or handle bars, must be swapped out with the newest and lightest. Tri-geeks, with their disk wheels and aero bars, tend to be squirrely riders, which may explain why it is against the rules to draft in most of their events.
So, if you still want to be a Trisexual—or at least look, and train, like one—here’s what you will need…
Read the full article HERE